❤️ 04th October 2017 - My Detox Plan

Email to my Drugs Team with my detox plan!! I’ve smacked it now!! My only addictions are my scripted medication, buprenorphine and methylphenidate. The former will be reduced and stopped when I do Plymouth. The latter I’ll be on for life!!

Smacked it peeps!

Morning

I'm sure you've caught up with R***. I wanted to explain my situation. I desperately want to start this job on Monday. They already turned me down at the initial interview. I imagine, someone else pulled out. Therefore I don't want to do anything that could be detrimental and jeopardise this opportunity.

I do however, still want a detox, but one that's planned in advance. I was thinking end of November / December for 2 weeks?

I am (at the moment) successfully withdrawing from alcohol.

I've cut down my benzo usage to 30mg max opposed to 80mg (possibly higher on occasions).

My opiate usage is still terrible, but one step at a time.

I plan to withdraw from alcohol this week. Using no more than 30mg diazepam daily. 

I am cutting down daily, yesterday I had one measure of spirit and two largers. 

I then wanted to start this job, still emailing R*** for support and perhaps a weekly catch up with J*** via email, monthly appointment?

Then we can arrange dates in advance for Detox for benzo withdrawal and opiates reduction.

I really need a detox, but I am honestly concerned about my mental stability whilst unemployed. I had concrete intentions to attempt suicide prior to this job offer.

Is this viable? Can we work around this idea? Or do you have another suggestion I could take on board? I really need your help and after receiving a few text messages that caused an anxiety attack I understand why you're not allowed your phone and now welcome the idea! 

Believe me, I would like nothing better than to be locked up, away from temptation and to be looked after right now. I almost ruined my taper and had a drink, with the aforementioned anxiety attack.

My alcohol withdrawal is mild. I felt awful Monday and much yesterday. Bar the craving when upset, physically I feel good. Today I have yet to reach the stage of anxiety or sweats, which again is an improvement.

J*** - May I have an appointment with you this week before I start work to discuss. When will you get my bloods back?

R*** - thanks for your support and telling me how well I'm doing. I am determined and I needed to hear that.

Dr. P - I know you said you'd never arrange another detox for me... but you know there's a little soft spot for me 😀, plus all that duty of care malarkey and I do still want detox! 

Kind regards and thank you all

Jay