In this role I literally only have to complete 4 pages of paper work, which admin soughts and uploads to the system.
NCS come in once a month to do CV workshops, so I don’t even have to stress about that.
Someone else goes out and sources the candidates. A job broker finds the jobs. All I have to do is get candidates to come in and apply for vacancies.
I will get bored as I will literally be sitting at my desk all day just seeing candidate after candidate. But I will not have to travel across loads of boroughs,?worry about travel fares, stress to get to meetings miles away for. 9 o’clock in the morning. I guess it’s an easy role.
It’s only my second day and I’ve already lost my candidate virginity. So my first one completely unsupervised.
I wanted to have at least four meetings booked by the end of today. I have 10 meetings booked.
The staff are all really nice so praying to God nothing gets caught out about my previous work history and I’m able to settle in and do a good job.
I went to the toilet earlier and took some Ritalin. I take it correctly due to its bioavailability and my high tolerance. Went for a cigarette afterwards. Amen and the receptionist was like oh the lady who went in the toilet after you found something you left behind. I shit myself it was the plastic syringe even know I’ve been very careful about making sure it was in my bag before I had left. Panic Field my brain.... only to notice my energy drink was on my desk. I had left in the toilet.
I told a story to the receptionist that I was worried I’d left my Tampax in the toilet. I do love to panic and think the worst.
I had a great day even though I was tired from lack of sleep last night. Had had a cheeky Monday night smoke. Didn’t sleep till 2 AM.
But as I travelled closer and closer to the place I call home I noticed my mood slowly dropping and dropping.
By the time I arrived home I was in a foul mood and I remained in this mood all night.
I have taken this mood out on N. This house is poisonous. Because I am now working my counsellor has agreed to have email sessions with me. I long to email her now when I need her help but I cannot be assured I actually have privacy. Either time I’m aware I have privacy I probably won’t feel the need to email her. My evening depression is only likely to get worse.
I don’t know what today I hope I can move quick because this house is killing me.
#itsnotaboutthedrugs
@Gemma_Stalked
