Nosing on my email to my fucking counsellor
BUT SOMEONE IS PUSHING ME AND PUSHING ME TOWARDS A SPECTACULAR FAIL. It's like
You want to see me crash and burn.
I'm likely to burn soon. You can't save me.
You destroyed me. I'm
Not
Just broken. I've shattered into a million pieces. I can't be fixed now. Well bar the truth which I've accepted isn't going to happen. Was
That car Daniel
Leaving
Or is he still with you: was that large 'cat/fox' him making is a escape?? Or just a mere coincident? The fact I can't hear you talking to each other any more. Yeah coz
I'm fucking deaf AND stupid.
Only the truth will save me and stop me self destructing.
Otherwise once Orion goes, I'm killing myself. And I'll be using plenty of drugs until that day.
I don't want to live this bullshit lie of a life so I actually want to die. It takes all my energy to look you in the face and talk
To you as all
I think about is how sick, how mean, how nasty you were to me. My own family destroyed me. I hate you.
I'll never love
You. Never thank you. Never be normal.
Never have kids. I'll just bullshit life for seven years.
Then I'll be free and I'll find out the real truth when I die.
I want the truth more than what I want life.
And then I can see to what sick extent
You went to,
To destroy me. I can't wait
To die!!!! 😀😀😅😅
And as I don't know the truth, I actually don't know How sick
You are. I know I had NOT ONE PSYCHOTIC EPISODE. But there's other unexplained things. The bugs for example. I realised even that could be created with human interference. Then that makes me wonder about all the scabs and wounds I had which wouldn't heal. And then I think about almost crashing and dying when these bugs swarmed at me when driving. Exactly how much influence did you have. Coz before D (discovery day, around June-July 2014) day there was
NO bad in my life. And then it all went wrong. And YOU watched me destroy my home and my car. You interfered and did things to make me more paranoid about the bugs, doing god knows what to make me think I'm mad. Coz people on speed see 'delusions' of bugs don't they. I have NO doubt you are
Far
Sicker than what I ever conceded.
Far sicker.
Tell me why would
I want
To live my life when my own family did what they did, possibly did a LOT more horrific things and definitely influenced these horrific things.
I am NOT stupid. I've realised everything which HAD a human influence. EVERYTHING which wasn't the dust mites (I'm praying this one was real but I'm most probably wrong too) but was actually done by my own fucking mother and father!!!!
YOURE SICK! DO YOU HONESTLY THINK I WANT TO LIVE A LIFE WITH A FAMILY LIKE YOU! YOU WOULD BE LOCKED AWAY FOR A VERY LONG TIME SHOULD THE TRUTH COME
OUT. IVE REALLSED YOURE SICKER THAN WHAT I COULD CONCIEVE.
I can't even trust the bugs where real. Not anymore. You, at LEAST, ensured my house was infested with fleas
And mites.
And as
You were responsible for destroying my house, I hope you fully repair the damage you have done, fully furnishing my house when I return.
I may move to Spain (you'll not no my address ever( where legal
Highs are
Still legal and return to ethylphenidate. Otherwise here until Orion dies doing DRUGS.
Hope you enjoy the monster you have created!
