Today my heart has been destroyed. Today W***** dumped me. Life doesn’t feel like it’s worth living anymore. And to make matters worse, it’s over fucking Facebook.
I was playing an game called ‘Owned’. I was buying all my friends I could afford. I bought my ex T*****.
At 11.12am I get a text from R** saying ‘you clearly (want) T***** more than I thought. Even after that chat we had yesterday he is the first you buy (which he wasn’t). You might as well call him if you haven’t already. He will probably take you back. That’s clearly what you want. As for me, I’m fed up of hearing his name. I’m done’
I call him and at first he’s cold and emotionless. I’m crying and he doesn’t care. I can’t believe this is my loving, caring guy. He tells me it’s over, ignores my pleading, my cries, how much I’m hurting.
Eventually he hangs up and refuses to answer my calls.
I’m crying so much at work. L*** recons he’s just angry and will take it back and regret what he’s said and done.
However I’ve never seen him act like this before.
This is the real deal. He eventually switches off his phone to avoid my constant calls.
On Facebook he changes his relationship status to single.
I’m crying so much at work I get sent home.
At 1.59pm I finally get a text in reply to my pleas about how much I want R**, not T*****. How much I love him. The text reads ‘you’re not interested in him, but you write he’s your man’. That was in relation to the nick names you can give people you own.
T*****’s girlfriend gave him that nickname and unless I change it, it stays.
I try to explain but it’s pointless. I’m crying in bed. Ask M*** to bring some weed to smoke. W**** texts saying he wants his clothes that I washed for him.
I explain they’re drying and when they’re dry I’ll bring them to his mum’s or I****** (his work).
He calls me up angry saying he needs them now, he’s not got enough clothes at his mum’s.
I know this is complete crap. I tell him I really don’t want to see him. I’m hurting too much. I would arrange something over the weekend though.
Pissed he didn’t get the answer he wanted, he hangs up.
L*** arranges to come and see me after work, ‘we’ll get loaded’. She wants to keep me company. I tell her about the clothes, and say when she gets the bus, to get off the stop earlier by R**’s work.
I’ll give her the clothes, and she can give them to him if he wants them that badly. She’s cool with that.
I pack up the wet clothes into the carrier bag. I use Asda, coz R**’s a bit of a snob like me and they are the cheapest supermarket bags I could find.
Get a text at 3.24pm saying ‘sorry x’.
Anyway I do my make up, which I cried off, put on my blue Adidas tracksuit bottoms, a little jumper and white cropped fur collar jacket. I look hot. Even in a trackie. I get plenty of whistles and attention as I walk through Mitcham to meet L***.
No point driving in rush hour, such a short distance. I wait in the alley by I*******, L*** takes the clothes and comes back. She tells me she said ‘are you W****?’ And ‘these are from J**. Sorry’ and laughed as she does.
As we’re walking away, L*** looks around and he’s standing outside the door calling me. Not wanting to walk back I call him and ask what’s his problem.
Anyway ends up walking back. W*****’s suddenly got his emotions back. He’s got tears in his eyes (not that he would ever let one drop). He says what he said was in anger, he’s sorry, he’s been listening to our song all afternoon. Chris Brown’s With You. And looking through all my pictures on Facebook. He wants to talk. I tell him I was sent home from work crying, did that make him feel good?
I feel myself wanting to cry. Say that was why I didn’t want to see him today and we’d talk tomorrow and went.
Me and L*** get lots of wine. L*** was right about him regretting it and not really meaning it.
At 5.40pm he texts me saying ‘I used the clothes as an excuse to see you coz I know I was wrong. I don’t like upsetting you. Sorry x’
Knowing the ball was in my court I tell him how much I was hurt and he couldn’t just dump me when he’s angry.
At 5.51pm he replies saying ‘I know. You say things you don’t mean when you’re angry. I close off. Just another thing I have to fix. Sorry’
Have a wicked night with L***. Get really twisted. Get loads of texts from R**. Ask him to give me a break. We’ll chat tomorrow. Can’t believe, all that hurt for nothing.
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