I have decided to keep record of when R** has hurt me.
Although he is the best I’ve ever had, by miles, as far as boyfriends’ are concerned, he’s no way near perfect.
If the time comes for us to move on; if he leaves me, I can read this and remember the pain and hopefully it’ll ease my sorrow.
If the time comes, and I leave him, I’ll have a justified list of bad things for my reason.
In a perfect world, none of this would have happened and I’d be blissfully happy like November 2007 - February 2008.
W****
Good Points
He would never cheat on me
Treats me like a lady
He likes to always pay and spoil me
He would make an excellent husband
I would like him to father my children
He doesn’t get pissed, smoke or do drugs
He genuinely cares about me
Me makes me laugh and smile
He’s very attractive and fit
He’s intelligent and can hold decent conversations
He wants to be with me forever
No matter how angry I am, his eyes makes me want to forgive him
90% I can’t fault his personality
I did something with him in the bedroom he’s never done before (not the exact transcript!! 😊)
I love his Frank Bruno laugh
He has the most beautiful, deep brown, eyes
And beautiful smile
I like it when he takes the piss out of me for being dumb
I love his sexy upper body
Bad Points
He snores and keeps me up most the time
He over anayalises everything
He is always right! And when he’s wrong he cops the hump
He’s jealous and insecure
His friends walk all over him
Too close to his family, especially his mother
When he’s in the wrong, he’ll always try to find something to make me look worse
He’s number one in my life and I’ll never be number one in his
Can be very inconsiderate at times
Can switch and be very cold and lack emotional
Can switch and be aggressive with is intimidating
Doesn’t stand up to S*****, pays double CS, phone bill and probably more he doesn’t tell me about
S***** makes kids hate me and he doesn’t change it. Will my children’s half brother and sister hate them? Get annoyed coz they have to share their dad?
In bed, coz a bit inexperienced, he’s shy at times (not exact transcript)
Broken no lie rule!
(2018 - to be honest, I have pushed out my memories of R**. They are locked far away in my brain. Having to write this, has forced me to unlock that box. I kinda hurts. Which means, to someone who’s not turned into a stone cold bitch, it really hurts. Fuck, yeah, I’ll be honest. It hurts. Out of all my serious other halves, while my first love will always be T****, R** will be my biggest regret. I wish S****** wasn’t a jealous bitch and didn’t use their kids as ammunition. She knew she wasn’t getting him back. Why try to make him unhappy. Why threaten him with denying access to his children if we were together. It’s a shame. I was the first girlfriend after the split. If I was second, I’d never of had to have that termination. Instead of pets, I’ve gave children... a 10 year old by now. But, I’m grateful I had the pleasure of spending 3 years with R**.
I’ve actually been super into girls recently... but thinking of R** makes me long for the boyfriend/girlfriend thing again)
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