I am TRYING to escape them. But house sale NOT going through.
I AM NOT safe in my own hind
The amount of abuse I receive in public means I do not want to be outside my home either.
My only respite was work. I was giving back to society, which I have relied on, when I have needed help. However the public hate campaign resulted in my employers instantly disliking me and eager for me to leave (made me leave before I wanted to)
Apple very kindly replace my brand new phone after hearing about the abuse / rape / wanting to escape on 19th May.
The new phone was taken on Thursday 24th May / Friday 25th May around 1am / 3.30am.
Tried to call my phone twice and it went to voicemail.
Just beginning to sort my life out again after the lack ‘phone hacking’ incident.
The phone was hacked and evidence on my twitter and email was deleted.
I am aware I have NO PRIVACY in the home I own and have not had since 2013.
I am NOT SAFE here.
I am abused badly in public due to the hate campaign.
People exclaim when I pull out a top of the range phone, scream at me to leave shops when browsing and ignore my pleas for help (police).
They’ve have told everyone I’m a terrible junkie who must be stalked for my own good.... when in reality, I’m a normal girl who uses occasionally, to escape the sheer anxiety and stress I have due to their abuse / hate campaign.
I have NO CHOICE but to try and escape. I am aware this means leaving EVERYTHING I have worked so hard for.
I am aware this includes leaving my beloved pets, my reason for living.
I promised never to touch a needle again if they left my phone alone. The subsequent phone hacking, for no reason, leads me to believe they want me to kill myself, so they can try to delete 4 years of evidence (inc. my blog)
Criteria For Abuse
*Disrespect - putting you down in front of people (hate campaign... they now want me to become this monster they’ve told the public I am. I’ve had people shout ‘YOU’VE LET YOUR MOTHER DOWN!’ My mother has watched me nearly die having seizures from using too much, take tablet overdoses and me being raped).
*Interrupting Calls - since being hacked, whenever I get / make important call, I get nuisance sales calls (I’m on TPS).
*Breaking Trust - Father and family members did work on house.. making it unsafe and due to the numerous access points, causing damp, mould and subsequent illness. Not having privacy. Even when switching fuse box off, finding electrical readings in window frames / door frames / lights (uncle did windows)
*Isolation - hacking phone, can’t use Facebook, can’t talk to people privately. Hacked WiFi so I can’t use it. Hacked work PC coz I checked work emails on hacked mobile. Hate crime means ‘friends’ don’t want to know me anymore.
*Harassment - Following me through tracked device and mass stalking campaign. Not allowing me ANY privacy since 2013. They need to know all my online passwords, need to check all my emails, see all my banking activity, Facebook etc. I’m stalked constantly, even when I’m going to work.
*Threats - Destroying or stealing my possessions.
*Denial - Pretending they don’t do this!! Pretending to the public they ‘care’ for me and I’m a terrible person who needs to be stalked for their own good. Blaming the drugs (when it continues when I’m blatantly sober)
*Isolation - can’t see friends as phone is hacked so no privacy. Also constant public abuse.
*Employment - Ruined coz hate campaign. Got rid of me before I wanted to leave. Always found excuses to ‘tell me off’ despite smashing my targets. Hate campaign means future employment is unlikely.
*Stalked / Tracked - Constantly on hacked device which switches itself on. And by public.
*Belittle / Humiliate - Lies told in hate campaign (Muslim / ESOL initially... now much larger)
*Frightened - Clearly not safe in house. Have to sleep on few possessions I want to keep.
*Behaviour Change - Had to change routines. Forced me to stop using drugs. Have to sleep on possessions to prevents them being stolen.
*Destroyed Possessions - Mobile phone, spare mobile phone, security camera, PC, laptop, hot tub, ANYTHING in garden. Ring replacement. PC / Laptop done so I cannot fix hacked phone.
*Hacking - CONSTANTLY!! Either mobile or via WiFi.
*Change Behaviour - Force me to stop using. However whilst they’re doing this
I will never stop! Will never promise to stop injecting for them again since they re/-hacked phone. Prevents me buying from DM.
*Stolen Ritalin (ADHD meds, stops me using stimulants) and Buprenorphine (stops me using opiates).
DASH
Frightened
Destroyed / vandalised property
Loitered work / home
Sexual assault
Persuaded others to help
WORK
Afraid to go to work
Professional reputation
Affected performance
Inability to perform
Increased leave
Becomes unemployed
HEALTH
Insomnia
Self medicating
Stress / panic attacks
Weight loss
Appearance
SOCIAL
Social life suffered
Becomes insecure
Lose ability to trust
Withdrawn
Isolation
Change number / name / appearance
FINANCIAL
Fraud
Stolen ££
Expenses of hacking / lack of security in home
Loss of wages
MISC.
Try to stop drug use.
They’re only reason I use
They’re aware, but only care about destroying evidence
Damage to needles (scars)
Stolen substances
Destroyed relationships with dealers through hacked phone and impersonation
I seriously need help in getting out of my house, which clearly I am not safe in.
On April the 19th I relapsed and they stole my phone and hacked it. This bring more concerns, as I went to Devon that weekend, and sorted out my new home.
I have no doubt they were listening in to my conversation with my estate agent. Therefore if I do get to start my fresh new life, I suspect my new home will be subject to whatever the hell they’ve done to this place, to make it so unsafe and miserable for me.
Apple thankfully replaced my phone on the 19th of May after hearing the horrific abuse I have suffered. On the 24th of May my phone went missing again. I tried to call it, and it went to voicemail on two occasions. When it suddenly appeared, it had been hacked again. This time for no reason (I can just about place some justification on the first phone hacking... although in the grande scheme, this was incredibly wrong full stop!)
My abusers claim they care about me. They claim they just want me to stop taking drugs. I promised I would NEVER touch a needle again, as long as my phone remained unhacked (they were still slightly hacking via any WiFi I used). This makes it clear, they DO NOT care about me or my use of drugs. Once the phone was hacked, the first thing they did was delete evidence of their abuse off my twitter account and email.
I am fully aware they will continue to abuse me, until I kill myself. This will enabling them to endeavour to ‘delete’ any evidence of the 4 years of sickening abuse I have had from them.
Until I have a safe means of accessing the internet in my own home, I feel I have no other option, but to clear my name and endeavour to escape this horrific house. Which I own.
I need to get my story told. People need to know the truth about me. And I am 100% confident in my congruency having nothing but a positive response to my life.
I have been reading about abusers. Abusers don’t stop abusing. The fact I now have concerns my new home will be ruined. Whilst in Devon, I experienced similar ‘stalking’ to what I have down here.
So they will not stop. Until I’m dead. If I have to break the promise I have made to my beloved pets, and not be their only owner until they die, I’m ensuring people know the truth about me. I’m going to have a good try at being able to live, abuse free!
At least if I do die, enough people will know the truth about me. People will know how I tried and tried to escape them, the subsequent misery and mental health problems... which right now.. is the only reason I use occasionally and drink.
So.. my story... I have ADHD, which wasn’t diagnosed and medicated until I was 32. I’ve had 4 psychiatrists (including Professor David Nutt), tell me, if I was medicated at an earlier age, I would not have substance abuse problems.
My mother openly admitted she did not stop smoking whilst pregnant with me (she did for my brother), so I also suspect, my disability, what I am being abused for, is her fault.
I fell into the cycle of self medication. Before my family knew of my drug problems, I had actually conquered as serious crack / heroin addiction and the subsequent debt I had accrued. I first became addicted to stimulants aged 17.
Unfortunately, before I was medicated. Due to stress at work, I began researching nootropics and legal highs (2013 aged 31). Unfortunately for me, I discovered their was a legal high called ethylphenidate and Ritalin was methylphenidate. So around April 2013, I began purchasing it. This was the start of my down fall. When I moved house, I was also signed off work sick, for stress. As soon as I started ethylphenidate I was addicted and began sniffing it daily.
Due to the damage to my nasal cavity I change to rectal administration.
Stupid curiosity lead me to try both heroin and ethylphenidate intravenously (March 2014). From then on I never used rectally again.
I was finally medicated with Ritalin December 2013, which briefly lead to me stopping using ethylphenidate intravenously, but I then explored other legal highs. It didn’t take long until tolerance with my medication built up and I ended up returning to injecting ethylphenidate.
Around July 2014, I visited a friend in Devon. Not wanting to use speed, I decided to inject my Concerta. This made me really sick (dirty hits) and she discovered a needle.
This is when the abuse begun. However their malicious behaviour was directed at my best friend, a male, who was living with me. They managed to convince him we were not alone in the house. Which in turned caused damage to his mental health (something which still affects him to this day), major damage to my property due to his drug fuelled rages and the break down of our relationship.
This lead to me disclosing my horrific addition problems to a friend, who told my father, and the ‘official’ moment happened when my ‘family’ knew in ‘real life’ about my problems.
I was now weighing around 6.7lbs.. and was close to death. Within a week I was admitted to an emergency detox.
As I had stopped collecting my medication, they started my Ritalin on a low dose. This killed me, as I was well aware that this low dose, which when I was first prescribed, was behind the reason for me to stop taking my medication and return to injecting ethylphenidate.
I left detox on half my prescribed dose (35mg opposed to 70mgs), so when I returned home, I began taking my meds one day and injecting ethylphenidate the second day.
I was not ready to stop using. I was forced into detox, which whilst I am grateful it saved my life, in hindsight I wish it hadn’t, due to the horrific abuse which followed.
My family, instead of doing any research into ADHD (having this means you’re prone to addiction due to self medicating) nor addiction (average addicted has 8 attempts at recovery), decided the solution was to make me believe I was mad. When I confronted them on this, they naturally, blamed the drugs. However my addiction had escalated long before they discovered. And none of these ‘symptom’ where noticeable prior to then. Whilst I may have believed this ludicrous excuse if they had contained the abuse to coincide with me having a bad addiction, they continued the abuse while I was fighting to stay sober. This in itself was evidence that the horrible experience I was subjected to was down to the people I needed most to help me.
This is when the hacking and the removal of privacy really hit big time. I was never not watched. And since then, I have never had an unhacked device (briefly with my new phone from December 2017 - April 2018).
They sold an article to the Sun and soon the public stalking began. I have been told numerous times I was in the Sun.
They used lightbulbs with cameras (I have evidence of this).
This only resulted in the decline of my mental health and increase in ADHD symptoms. They are well aware this is one of the sole factors for me using. Despite this, they continued.
There was a further emergency detox and I was even sectioned (I did have evidence my father had lied to the doctors... however, life most things, this has vanished). The sectioning was a lovely moment of respite!
Due to the number of ‘real’ mentally ill patients, I could easily sneak drugs in, and continued to use just as much as I was on the outside. In peace. No one knew. My key worked even visited me and didn’t have a clue.
By June 2014 I stopped. The abused was horrific. Again, I did not want to stop. I was forced to stop.
My November 2014, I began looking for employment again (I took a large redundancy payment from my previous job).
Whilst people were interested in my CV upon meeting me, they were no longer interested. It was like they knew I had substance abuse problems.
By January 2015 I had begrudgingly accepted a job I knew I would not like. It was stressful and no one had lasted long in the role. Due to this, no one was willing to train me correctly and I was expected to rectify a stack of paper work as tall as I am, filled with errors. I was no longer on Ritalin due to my substance abuse problems and had been medicated with axamoxitien (non stimulant ADHD meds), which also gave me horrible side affects of anxiety and constant menstral bleeding.
The depression caused me to yet again seek comfort in ethylphenidate. It didn’t take long for me to lose a needle... and subsequently my job.
Upon ‘officially’ discovering my parents went mental. We finally agreed I would rent out my home and go to a 12 week rehab.
Whilst the public hate campaign may have eased off, the abuse didn’t.
Upon restarting Concerta, and the natural insomnia from taking a stimulant, they abused me.
Whilst withdrawing from opiates I couldn’t sleep, so they abused me. Until I found a BBC programme with someone else going through opiate withdrawal who stated they could not sleep... then the abuse stopped.
I had 14 weeks of peace when I went to rehab. It should have been 12, but the manager was so concerned about me being trapped with my abusers on Xmas day, when I couldn’t get away, she let me stay an additional two weeks.
They all told me not to come back to my abusers. I wish I had listened to their advise. But I came back, the abuse continued and naturally I relapsed.
I did secure work. But due to my abusers causing the breakdown of the relationship with the person supplying me buprenrophine (stops you using heroin) and knowing my home was not safe, I ended up relapsing.
Even when I found another job, they continued the abuse, stopping my alarm from going off, making me miss work and their hate campaign to destroy my reputation meant it was clear my new employers didn’t want me to stay.
Even though I smashed my targets this didn’t change.
I got a new phone December 2017, but was still living with someone I thought was a friend but clearly was assisting them. He ended up raping me and was just someone who made me use more due to his relentless ignoring rules and bringing drugs back.
On April 19th I relapsed and they hacked my phone, ensuring they could listen in to the discussion I had with my estate agent. I have no doubt they are ensuring now, if I get to move and have my fresh start... that my new home will be equally as horrific as this one.
I managed to get my phone replaced by Apple on the 19th of May due to the abuse. I had just begun to re-sort out my life. But in order to delete some evidence of their abuse, on the 24th they took my phone and hacked it again. Even though I had promised never to touch a needle again if they left my phone alone.
This in itself it evidence they do NOT CARE about me or me being clean. I can only believe they want me to kill myself so they can get their dirty little hands on my mobile and attempt to delete evidence of the 4 years of abuse I have.
The abuse ticks all the boxes in domestic abuse, bar punching me. Everything else they have done.
All I wanted was my fresh start, privacy and anonymity.
Not too much to ask for as a 36 year old woman.
Hacking my phone for no good damn reason is evidence in itself they do not care about me or my substance abuse (which now is clearly to relieve myself from the anxiety they cause and the abuse they subject me to
The abuse spans from the obscure... swapping my tobacco for a brand I don’t smoke... to the illegal.. stealing my Ritalin and buprenorphine.. to the down right ludicrous... having an inferior ring made, and instead of giving me a 24 carrot gold ring with 4 diamonds, valued at £800 20 years ago, replacing it with an 18 carrot one with no diamonds valued at £375 today.
I truly believe death is my only option for escape now. But if I have to die, I want people to know the God damn truth about why.
They are evil. They are relentless, they abuse me for no reason, and after 4 years the amount of evidence accrued can’t be erased by them getting their hands on my phone and deleting my blog.
Please help me escape them and clear my name. I have no hope left otherwise. I think I will have to die to escape. But if so, I want enough people to know my death has fuck all to do with drugs, but is purely due to the unrelentless, sickening abuse I have suffered for 4 years. Due to my family.
Thanks.
