❤️ I’m Seriously Ill

Well Monday i had two voicemails from Dr. A***** G******. When it was well known I was banging up daily, he was the only GP who was allowed to see me.

Now it’s either him or Dr C**** another senior GP.

I saw Dr C**** a couple of weeks ago. I explained my itching, the fact the judgmental doctors at St. George’s where going to do a blood test, then saw IVDU come up on my record and that changed to me having to visit the GP. I told him the receptionist only gave me an appointment after discovering I worked and owned my own house. And when I finally got to see a GP I was just given strong antihistamines, which helped a little. 

Dr. C**** has been the first non-judgemental doctor I’ve seen in the past 3 years. Arranged for a blood test and gave me scabies cream. Apparently enough for 2 applications, but only being little, I’ve got enough for 4. So I’ve got 2 left for when/it the itching creepy crawly feeling starts again. I explained to him. My drug use was initially blamed for this. No one has taken me seriously, and all I haven received before was a higher dose of buprenorphine or antipsychotics, just to knock the ‘crazy girl’ out. 

I also told him I believed my use hide my conditions, as the cleaner I got, the MORE the symptoms where present. He finally got a blood test arranged for me.

I arrived home. Applied the scream and the itching stopped!!

I had to email the GP

THANK YOU DOCTOR CHANA!!!!

Dear Sirs

Please forward to Dr. Chana. The cream he prescribed has worked and for the first time, in a long time, I am not itching like a loon!

Even my hair has stopped, the creepy crawly feeling too!

I’m hoping keeping the heating on high, will reduce whatever it is in this damn house driving me mad!

Every single other doctor has said the same thing... it’s my drug use.

But, as I’ve used for over 20 years I’m very familiar with the effects / Withdrawal of drugs.

God bless him so much, for being non judgmental, believing me and prescribing me something that’s brought so much relief.

Please pass my comments to his manager. He is an excellent doctor.

I might have drug abuse problems, but I still work, pay my taxes and contribute to society. It’s incredibly disheartening to have any problem blamed on the activities I chose to do when I’m not working.

I’m pretty sure, I will not be symptom free until I leave this house.. But for the past 3 years he’s the first doctor to actually listen to me, believe me and prescribe something that actually helps my problem (opposed to giving me a stupidly high dose of buprenorphine or having me drugged up on antipsychotics).

Please confirm he’s received my letter of thanks.

The frustration of people not believing me, including my own family, I’m not going to lie, was pushing me towards doing something stupid/being sectioned

Thank you so much. If the problem persists I hope he will continue to work with me and endeavour to get to the bottom of this long standing condition

(P.s. - you can tell him the nurse at St. Helier was, as predicted, judgemental. Initially insisting on trying to use the two veins in the crook of my arm before giving up and using the one I asked her to use!)

Kind regard

Jay

During our second appointments he prescribed my Ritalin script early and checked my bloods and said, apart from having a raised CRP (C-reactive protein, the test which can determine if your body is fighting infection). He told me mine was 55. It should be between 1-5. He said it all looked fine though, but he would need to refer to previous test.

Then I spoke to J*** at MDART and he confirmed that whilst I’ve been in this house, I’ve always had an raised CRP, with scores of 55, 68 and 163.

So after hearing Dr.A*****’s voicemails I began to phone for an appointment. I couldn’t attend any of the early / day ones due to work. On the Monday morning after getting my Ritalin script I needed to in. The tube was also severely delayed. Even though I called and emailed to explain I was stuck waiting on the tube, on Friday the two managers reprimanded me for being late. Even though both of them had arrived later than 10am (my arrival time on Monday), they’re seriously gripping onto every excuse possible to get rid of me due my 6 month probation.

Bearing this in mind, and needing to utilise this for MDART, I explained I couldn’t take an 8.30am appointment.

The receptionist begged me to take an 8.30am one, even saying they could write me a letter.

I will phone them this morning and see if there’ any cancelled appointments. Even though it says URGENT NOT OVER THE PHONE. They may allow this due to my inability to get time off.

I have also explained I’m seeing Dr. P on Thursday, so I could possibly attend before that, and if not could they liaise with Dr. P so she could break the bad news on their behalf.

As I stand to lose everything if I sell my house (bar mental, hard plastic and glass.... if I do have something life threatening or terminal, I will refuse treatment.

I have nothing to live for.

My own FAMILY started this crazy stalking campaign, most of my possessions are fucked. I’ve only got little Orion who’s clearly affected by whatever i have in my house. He’d be better of without me.

Gonna call again now. Update soon

A very worried J