Finally I've had my interview with rehab guy. It's gonna take 4-8 weeks to get it sorted. I have to go to a dual diagnosis rehab due to my ADHD. The rehab guy said he would make sure I could take my methylphenidate AKA Ritalin there as some won't let you take any medications.
Having my methylphenidate is crucial. I want to learn to live prescribed with it in a controlled environment so when I'm out coping without drugs should be easier.
I'm praying to God I get my script back. I don't think it'll be worth going otherwise as I can just see myself using again.
My ADHD was awful today. My head felt like it wanted to explode. Staying still was impossible. Due to me wanting to give stimulant free urine tests, I haven't smoked for 5 days. I have never used so little in my whole drug using life.
My psychiatric nurse asked me to describe my ADHD as she too noticed it was very predominant this afternoon. I explained it was like a kettle which could only be switched off with using stimulants. So I use, kettle switches off and cools down. Next day it's still cool. Day after it begins to boil. Day after that it's boiling but can't be switched off without using.
My head wanted to explode this afternoon. Yes I've had a smoke now, so will have a couple of OK days.
Heard my Bessie detox mate's in the nick for drink driving! She's terrible for doing that. When I'm with her, I offer to drive. I hardly drink so only have a glass. She's drinking from waking.
It's so sad, detox won't have her back as she broke the DVD player, poured someone's coke all over the floor (blamed me! Yes I was pissed at the time, specially since I was bullied so badly because of it), and stired shit by slagging everyone off behind their backs.
Thankfully she sent a text admitting it to another resident who told the truth to spare me.
So they've refused to readmit her. She keeps trying to overdose. I'm scared she'll end up locked up in the nut house.
If you've read my experiences you'll know there's no help whatsoever in those places. The nurses are too busy dealing with the real crazy people to even converse with those who are sane of mind.
You're ignored, locked away and will only deteriorate.
Mental institutions are NOT suitable for those suffering drug addiction.
The Mental Health Code of Practice states when detained the reason for your detainment must be addressed. I got no treatment for ADHD, addiction, drug abuse or therapy for my psychosis created by mum and dad. Even though mine wasn't real, it still wasn't addressed.
Seriously, people who abuse drugs and overdose need detox and rehab. The nut house is only for people who talk to Jesus, know the Queen and worship Satan.
Never try to get someone who is mentally capable but suffering metal illness sectioned.
It's ruined me. Bye bye career! Drugs detox, not to bad. But mental enough to be sectioned... I don't think my career in education project management will be resurrected.
Anyway please wish me luck on getting my script back! I want to be normal, and have only refrained from drug abuse when on Ritalin.
Love and bless
J x
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